I have entered in to a season of being without. In my life I have found myself in many similar seasons - without a friend, without a date, without answers, without direction,etc - but being without a job can be a little terrifying at times. The endless number of question marks stemming from this one blank space can wreak serious havok on the mind, the spirit and the body. And thus was my life over the last two weeks - seeking and searching and applying and waiting... and waiting... and waiting... for answers that are not forthcoming. And in the middle of that waiting, I had become anxious. It is not natural for me to wait and see. So, in this "wait and see" season of my life, I have found my spirit growing restless within me. But what I have also found, is a desire to quiet that spirit with truth. And because I have knocked, the door has been answered. The Lord has been filling the spaces in my life with His truths. As I dove in to my devotional this week, I was rewarded with an excerpt about contentment. The verse that accompanied the topic was 2 Corinthians 9:8 - "
And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work."
And the truth of this verse begin to come to clarity for me and it rooted itself in my heart. God has the ability to bless us abundantly, but He chooses instead to give us only those things that we need to do His good work. So, if we don't have right now, it is because it is not needed. If we believe that God gives us what we need then we must be able to look at our lives, and the things we are without, and understand that they have not been given (or have been taken away) because they are not needed for what God is doing or is about to do in our lives.
The things that I really need will be more than taken care of by the Father who loves to lavish us with His riches:
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? Matthew 6:25-31
Just as He takes care of the flowers and the birds, so will He also provide for us. He will give us exactly what we need. And sometimes not a fraction more. Sometimes all we get is our daily bread - enough for this moment. So that we may learn to trust Him in every moment. And we can begin to understand that what we have already, right now, is enough for God to do what He wants to do.
"But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that."
1 Timothy 6:6-8
So, this season of being without is exactly where I am meant to be. I am not wasting it, or abusing it, I am accepting it and trying to find what God is doing in and through it. And there is a part of me that still wants to pray: "But, God, I need a job." And, infact, I do still pray for Him to provide one. But standing on these truths helps me to know that I will have one in His timing. I will be without until God requires that I am with. It eases anxiety considerably to know that I have all I need. And for the rest I am taking my cues from Paul:
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13
